How to make a man think as you need
As it is important to be able to convince the interlocutor on its side, it is clear to all. That's just not all of it can. Usually people who are trying to persuade someone, make it pretty compulsively. And if you disagree with their opinion once, irritated and nervous. As a result, each flee debaters in their opinion. This is a non-constructive approach to solving any problem — both domestic and industrial.
Anyone who is interested in positive, not with fists to defend strikes its own point of view, and uses some psychological techniques. They can be called manipulative. Manipulation involves the psychological impact on someone to change his behavior or perception by certain tactics. Usually nenabljudatelnyj people and realizes that they are being manipulated. It seems to him that he makes a decision in good faith, without guessing what to the correct conclusion that it pushed the adroit Manipulator.
Manipulation at first glance seems unquestionable evil. And she really evil when the manipulator is acting in self-interest, not unethical, resorted to deception and blackmail. But there are also positive manipulation, which serve good purposes or are committed to mutual benefit. Thus, manipulation is only a tool used by people. And what they are, positive or negative, depends on what is the purpose of their use. In fact, the manipulation is one of the ways of beliefs to which people resort quite often.
To persuade the man to his point of view, you need to figure out features of his personality. Depending on the chosen tactics and behavior in the disputed issue. Classifications of human psycho-types set. The most famous is by temperament, but she does not understand how behaves in a dispute, e.g. the same phlegmatic or choleric. Therefore, in this case, it is wise to include his interlocutor to one of the following groups:
- people confident, relentless;
- uncertain, fluctuating;
- aggressive, forwards;
- passive, indifferent.
1. People confident, relentless
So, is it easy to win over stubborn human? This would seem impossible, because he knows what he wants, and I am confident in the correctness of his views. This questioner is good to have his ally. But the approach to it, you can still find and if his view is opposite to ours. Just need to pick the right key ": find the" Achilles heel "is a weak spot.
Since such limits as confidence is often matched by self-confidence, you can try to use it to convince his interlocutor and persuade him on their side. The fact is that many self-assured people quite painfully perceive that their capacity and ability questioned. If we compromise in effect openly of such a person, it will try by all means to prove otherwise, and for the sake of it would be willing to go to great lengths, including change your point of view.
2. Uncertain, wavering
Human indecisiveness, convince uncertain, fluctuating at first glance. But this is a misconception. Working with him is harder than with the person absolutely. The behavior of human indecisiveness introduces the interlocutor is misleading: he agrees with everything, nods his head, expresses its sympathy. And when the interviewee feels its superiority and it seems that victory is already in his pocket, suddenly says "no", rejecting all the proposals under any pretexts.
If we think that the human indecisiveness worth press, as he immediately agrees, he is deeply mistaken. Contrary to his personal space he perceives as aggression, will in itself be avoided and assertive questioner. Perseverance towards him was inappropriate, it is reserved for active individuals.
The main difficulty is to immediately recognize human indecisiveness and act on the corresponding scenario. If we relaxed his soglashatelskim behaviour, in expectation of easy victory immediately publish all their trump cards, we have nothing to be open when he refused and did not wish to accept our point of view.
Human indecisiveness issue mitigating and vague phrases such as "as", "only", "not too intuitive" (instead of "weird"), "not too good" (instead of "bad"), "managed to get" (instead of "received"), etc. p. In addition, cheerleaders should and what our interlocutor too easily and quickly agrees with our position.
Persuade human indecisiveness on your side you can, first demonstrating its own indecision and begged his help or advice. Let it razgovoritsja and express their views, and during the conversation, their arguments can be corrected so that it will accept our opinion for his.
3. Aggressive, attacking
Aggressively customized interlocutor can also convince. Though not always aggression is expressed openly. Covert aggressor recognize on hands, compressed into a fist or hand laid down behind his back. It can concatenate hands and nervously they Palm with the thumb.
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The aggressor understands only force, so you don't need to consume him and showing their weaknesses, to exercise doubt and uncertainty. Must act vigorously and persistently.
When talking with aggressively tuned man is not worth to dedicate sight. Watch the best thing at one point over his perenosicej. Protect yourself from negative energy emanating from the aggressor, and not to fall under its influence by using visualization, mentally picturing themselves located inside the fortress or turning its back on him a mirror.
Feeling in another person because of the nature, the aggressor may recognize him right.
4. Passive, indifferent
And yet another trait — people indifferent. Topic of conversation does not affect its interests, so he doesn't care whose side to take. And here the chances of making it to his ally, not spending a lot of mental strength and energy. This happens if we call him the benefits he would receive by taking our side. Perhaps he will do it simply because it wants to, we quickly left him alone.
Thus, every human trait needs special approach which should ensure success in attracting an interlocutor on their side. In addition, people are more willing to support the views of those people who sympathize with them. And here will be useful to work on their communication skills and personal charm, charisma.
It's easier to convince people on their side will be those who will be able to establish contact with his audience on a personal level, talk about yourself, your plans and show that he can be trusted. Those who fail to do so, will not help and convincing arguments.
Talk to those who need to be convinced of his rightness, you need to clearly and intelligibly. Person, poorly versed in the subject, easily "realised" and it will not have any chance to win the dispute. Don't be the one who says insincerely, lying and trying to manipulate someone else's opinion.
Sincerity, heartiness and efficient and able to bribe do wonders, including persuading agree with someone else's point of view.
To convince the person on their side, need to demonstrate their abilities active listener. You cannot climb ahead, forcing his point of view, without having listened to his arguments. Next, we can make adjustments that will help convince him to accept our opinion. It will be easier to do this when he sees how respectful we treat his point of view.
But the victory is not always it happens fast, so don't be afraid to retreat, giving the interlocutor the time on analysis of our position. Its looking we can only alienate potential future ally.
It should not be forgotten that in the science of persuasion big role for body language: gestures, mimicry, intonation. Smile, friendly intonation, Visual contact, open posture, handshake offer to yourself and help you gain confidence. The same can be said about the treatment to the interlocutor on behalf of. "The sound of his own name to man is the sweetest sound, Dale Carnegie wrote.