7 great tips to learn to treat everything easier
The lives of many people consists of solid experiences: they begin to worry, barely opening her eyes in the morning, worried all day, anxious thoughts keep them awake at night. And worry they have plenty, and deciding one disturbing their problem, they immediately find another.
In General everyone has plenty of reasons to worry. And these reasons may be as minor and major. We can prosecute as anxiety for loved ones and their future, fear of illness and distress about the officer or curve of oblique view of superior and t. d.
About the people bespokojashhihsja on any occasion, say they are vulnerable, impressionable and have subtle mental organization. Usually such people can be relied upon, they are responsible and are required, unless, of course, excessive excitement does not prevent them to cope with the task.
The truth is, they themselves, if not change their attitude to life, risk in the end get a breakdown.
Antipodes people who get too close to your heart, take all are the so-called pofigisty, which generally do not give much importance, and all the negative events of the strike of his life. True pofigisty typically "take yourself to friends" people responsible, because someone must solve their problems instead.
Often the word "can't" is used together with the words "healthy" or "reasonable". People who are representatives of a healthy "screw it all", decide for yourself, "what is good and what is bad. All that is bad, they perceive distance, without giving it a value. At the same time, they are able to see positive and enjoy life.
It can be said that a reasonable pofigisty live in accordance with the principle: "be easier!", "do not bury in the head or, as the English say," Take it easy! ".
"How to stop worrying and start living" — a book under this title posted by American psychologist Dale Carnegie. And thus, the theme "As it is easier to treat life" really relevant. Because unrest and anxieties we don't notice how time flies and runs our life and stress and depression in General make it shorter.
What are the installation, you must give yourself to look at life easier and stop worrying about and without?
1. Not dramatiziruem events
There is a saying-"make a mountain out of a molehill." It is used when people talk about exaggeration, give something unnecessarily large values. It is suitable to the occasion when we izvodim himself experiences about their own misses, greatly exaggerating their scope.
Psychologists argue that people are typical events dramatize parents since childhood gave installation, that life is a continuous succession of difficulties to overcome. As a result of such people, firstly, the need before someone to report on their actions to combat the difficulties and, secondly, in need of a positive evaluation of these actions. And thus put themselves at the mercy not only of the event itself, exaggerating its importance, but also on the opinions of others.
2. Not if think up
It seemed to us that we looked at askance, and here we are build in the head almost conspiracy theory: Chief wants us to dismiss, employees build intrigues, etc. d. Not better, if a passerby looks at us with a smile-we immediately if think up that with our hairstyle or clothing that is something wrong, once so his laugh. And the mood for the whole day is ruined.
Decided that we see other thoroughly and know what they think or feel, we almost certainly mistaken. Passer is likely smiling my thoughts, and could be simply not in the mood. Dodumyvaja for others, we exaggerate their role in the lives of other people, because everyone is busy at the outset.
If we are too worried about any omissions in a relationship, it's best to delicately ask what they are called, rather than silently worry. Indeed, some say that the shortest path is a straight line.
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3. Do not set yourself on the negative
The Brothers Grimm fairy tale "is a clever Elsa". Young girl surrounding felt unusually reasonable, saw the future in sombre colours and your mood has infected others. For example, after going down in the cellar, she noticed a pick left builders, and nafantazirovala how to marry, give birth to a child, then it will kill the Kirk, which will fall on him from the wall. Picturing in the mind such dark vision of the future, it was flammable. ELSA still married but the child never bare because the first mad and ran away from the village.
By the way, there is a concept in Psychiatry-smart syndrome Elzy». They called State of obsessive anxiety for the future, which is seen in pessimistic tones.
But, perhaps, each surrounded by there is not one person who sees the future in gloomy light or any action predicts a negative result. And, thus, the bane of pessimism not only their lives but also the lives of friends and loved ones. If this quality is inherent in us, the quicker we get rid of it.
4. Live in the present, not the past
Many people have a tendency, which otherwise than masochistic, and not to mention: they mentally return to the unpleasant events of the past, experiencing negative again and again. They cannot forget the wrongs inflicted on them sometime. There is even an expression-"stash of resentment."
Psychologists believe that such "hoarding" causes a number of diseases, including cancer. Vital energy is expended on scrolling in the mind of an unpleasant situation, the internal dialogue with the abuser which we mentally try to give a decent reply.
They say that like attracts like. When we constantly irritable and accumulate grievances, then turns into a spiteful bundle of nerves, drawing to itself the new offenders. And out of this vicious circle one: forget old grudges, forget about obidchike, think positive, start the day with a smile, drawing in his life positive and welcome.
5. Do not generalize
After suffering a few setbacks, we mentally reward yourself the title loser. And the bit on failures, we again set itself a negative result than sophisticate.
With resentment from defeats somehow remain in our memory for much longer than the joy of accomplishment.
Not to forget about all the good that happens in our lives, you can start a diary where to celebrate their achievements and pleasant moments of life, albeit minor. In difficult moments these records make us smile and help restore emotional balance.
6. Getting rid of perfectionism
Perfectionists are people who for whatever came from, all make the perfect way. And that perfectionism can be directed and on others, to which they make excessive demands. Perfectionists often themselves depend on other people's opinions, because need praise and under someone else's expectations.
This desire to achieve ideal often takes a pathological form and can cause breakdown. "Perfection has no limits, so perfectionist seldom happy with the result. Rejoice in the present he is unable, because of his dissatisfaction pursues the imperfections and endless search for the ideal.
Live easier is to learn to accept the world as it is.
7. Do not drive yourself to the rigid rules of
We all have certain responsibilities at home and at work. And that's fine. But saying "we should", "should" or "should", because it told some rules, seemingly intact, we sometimes don't think whether we "should" do as they prescribe. Following them, we sometimes arrive through their desires and want your life, because disclaim their own desires and overlook their own opportunities.